Tuesday, November 13, 2007


Family has so many meanings. so many options. We can feel embraced by our families, we can feel oppressed by their actions. we can struggle with the feelings that these people who raised you. Who brought you into the world are not the ones you go to for comfort.

As the holidays approach it gets even more illusory. You can feel the creeping anxiety just about a week after Halloween. The idea that you are trapped. That you must spend time around a thanksgiving day table with people who have the title of your family. But somehow always leave you feeling sick. Sick to your stomach for what is lost. For not being able to open to the grace of the table. For not living in a place where they can honor themselves so they can only provide tension, and destruction.

For me, being thankful is a daily event. I am thankful for all the lessons I've been taught by my family. I'm thankful for all the ways that they have contributed to my life. I am thankful that I don't need to spend Thanksgiving with them.

As we stretch into the holidays and the end of a particularly exciting year. I want to plant the seed for new growth in the family department. I want to be open to a blossoming. A blossoming of feeling nourished and supported and to being receptive to the many definitions of family.

In this thought seed. I have no conditions placed on what will be. I will continue to ask for what I need and I will take the brave steps forward to watch my family develop. The family I choose to create. In gratitude.

No comments: